Praise the Lord!

I have been wanting to post for awhile now. I will start to write something and then my thoughts freeze and I just don't seem to be able to put my thoughts together and write a complete post. I should have shared this a week ago in a Thankful Thursday post, but just couldn't get my thoughts to come together. However here is a much overdue update post:

After much prayer and struggle, I found a full time job! I was working at a college bookstore as a part time, temporary worker. It was going good, but just didn't pay what I need. The reason I accepted this position this past summer was because I thought maybe by working there it would be easier to hear about other positions in the community or maybe at the college. I have been working with kids for quite some time and ran a home day care for years, therefore I decided that I no longer wanted to work in that field and wanted to work in the social work field, since I do have a degree in the field. As I started looking for a social work job, I kept running into a wall and nothing was opening up for me. I felt very frustrated and discouraged and really struggled with the Lord about this. I started to think about other types of jobs and possibly looking into the center based child care field (since I did have child care experience). Well I finally got to the point to where I said "OK God I don't understand what you are doing in my life and don't understand why a job has not opened for me. I trust you and know that you can open the right door, and I will just 'Be Still and Know You are God.'" In my prayer time I got to the point where I just prayed that for whatever reason He had for me and my family to go through this difficult time, that He would use it to strengthen us and for His glory. I also prayed that when the right job came along he would make it happen in a way that only he could and that it would all just fall into place. Well that is what happened!

It was a Tuesday and I was working at the bookstore. A lady came in and needed a staff ID badge. I went to the counter to take her picture and we started talking. She told me that she just started working at the Early Childhood Education Center on the college campus. No big deal, other staff from there have came into the bookstore to get their IDs. However, this time it was different. I started asking her about her job and how she liked it so far. She was very positive about the center and I told her I have thought about apply there and she said they still had some teacher positions open and I should apply. After making her ID I walked with her to the Human Resource Department to talk to them about the job. I was told that I had to apply online and it would take up to a month to be hired. I thought I don't want to wait another month. Well, I went home that Tuesday night and applied online. On Wednesday after work I went down to the Childcare center with resume in hand and asked for the director and was going to give it to her in person (thinking maybe I could speed up the process). When the director came, she informed me she just got my resume about an hour ago and left me a message 15 minutes ago about wanting to set up an interview. Needless to say, I did not get that message! She asked to do an on the spot interview right then. I had the interview on Wednesday and they asked me to come in for a second interview/ observation on Thursday and she called me on Friday to offer me a full time position and I started the following Wednesday. My position is a toddler teacher and I really like it. I have been impressed with the facility and the administration, which is so different from where I worked before. I am responsible for the next 2 weeks of lesson plans and that has been fun. I am still in the transitioning process, but I think this will be good. I praise the Lord for how He provided this job and am very thankful. Through my journey of looking for a job, I have been so loved and supported by many people. God has shown me His love over and over again on this journey.

Until Later,
~Betty~

Bits of Everything

This sure has been a busy month since the last time I posted. I will try to catch up on some of the things that have happen and some things that have not happened!

Jody turned 6 earlier this month. She was so excited!!!! We celebrated her birthday at a local park and invited our friends to join us for a time of play, cake, and ice cream. The kids played and the adults were able to visit with each other. We all seemed to have a good time. I am so thankful for the friends I have. They have been such a blessing to me.

Jody is enjoying school so far and loves to ride the bus with her big sis. She seems to have an inner excitement about school. She has been bringing site words home to study and she gets so proud of herself when she can tell you how to spell them.

Bethany had her first Bible quiz meet of the year. She did pretty good. Along with answering questions the kids have to memorize 20 Bible verses they have to say by the end of the year. Bethany has already said 7 of them. She does good at memorization. I was proud of her.

Bethany still struggles with talking at school. Every week in her weekly Friday folder, she gets a check for needs to control talking. Actually she did have one week with no checks and she got to be student of the week. She was so excited and we were proud. When report cards came out, she did really well. The book work Bethany does at school is really good. We just have to get her to learn how to control her talking. :)

John's job has been very stressful lately, because they have been getting ready for their federal review. At last, the review is now over and he is able to relax a little more. The past couple of weeks God has been reminding me of what a great husband I have and I am so thankful he is my bestfriend and glad he is in my life.

Right now I am working two part time jobs and not making the money I need to be making. I am back working at a local college book store and at a local gym in the childcare area. I am still looking for one full time job!!!! I have sent out many resumes and applyed for many jobs. I have had 3 interviews and did not get any of those jobs. During these dissappointments I have been frustrated, discouraged, and angry. However, I have also came to the point of trusting God even when I don't understand.

I believe God could open the right door and provide a job for me.
I believe He has a plan for me and wants to provide good things.
I believe He can do more than I can think or imagine.
I belive God will provide for me.
I believe God loves me.
I believe God is in control.
I believe God's timing is the best.

God has brought me to stand on each of these statements by faith. During this time in my life I have doubted my faith more than any other time in my life. I don't know God's plan or why certain things are happening, but I have come to the point in my faith that I CHOOSE to trust God and believe that His word is true. I have had to DECIDE to believe these statements I just wrote. I have been so discourageda and frustrated about not finding a job and it taking so long, but I choose to trust Christ and His plan - even if I don't yet know what that is. The past couple of weeks I have just given my search over to the Lord and decided to trust that when God wants me to have a job, He will provide it. Until then I am looking for other ways in my life that God is blessing me - and I am finding them! I don't know why God has not blessed me with a job, but I am blessed in a lot of other ways. He has been showing me His love in so many other ways. I see God's blessing in my marriage. I could not imagine going through this time without John. Some of the decisions that we have had to make could have caused a division in our spirit and cause problems, but we have been in unity with our decisions. Our marriage is surviving a very stressful time in our lives and that is a blessing from God that I am glad I have. I have some wonderful friends that God has showed me His love through them. I have a wonderful church family that loves and supports us. As God is teaching me to trust Him for a job and with our finances, He is also showing me His love.

This is just some of the lessons God is teaching me. I hope to find the time to share more soon. I also hope to be back and share that I have found a job, but that is up to the Lord.

Until Later
~Betty~

Back to Blogging

I sit hear wondering what I should write and how do I get myself back into blogging. I have taken a break and am now ready to come back, but not sure what all to share and what all to write about, therefore I’m just going to start by writing my thoughts.

I have decided that I want to continue blogging, because I want a place and an opportunity to share my thoughts about life, organization, parenting, weightloss, and what the Lord is teaching me in my daily walk with Him and I how feel about that.

There are several issues and God lessons that I could share right now and I am planning to share them and express them here on my blog. Here on my blog, I want to be able to share more of my heart and what God is doing in my life than what I have done in the past. I hope that if anyone is still out there reading this that you would come back and share your heart, thoughts, and encouragement with me as I share how God is walking with me On The Journey to Victory. I also hope that as I share my journey to victory that God will use this blog to encourage others.

I am making some changes in my life. One of the biggest changes I am making is I’m going to leave my comfort zone of staying home and providing child care. I am going to look for a job and this scares me and makes me nervous. I have been thinking about what kind of job I want and where I want to work and where I do not want to work. I am finding that I know in my heart what kind of job I want, but in many ways it is hard to describe. I wonder if the type of job I want even exists (that is for pay at least). I would like to do something in children’s programming in a Christian atmosphere. I am considering many different options and I need to pray more about it and rely on God to open the door He wants me to go through. For some reason I feel like I’m on my own and feel like I have to find the perfect job all on my own. That is when I get scared and worried. I am consistently reminding myself that I need to trust the Lord to take care of these issues. I am also looking for a work environment where I can grow professionally. Knowing what can be out there and where I came form before also concerns me. I was talking with my friend Pat this week and she reminded me that when we have faith our God is big enough to provide me a job that would satisfy my heart’s desire and to be able to meet the financial obligation that I need it to accomplish. After that phone conversation the Lord convicted me of how little faith I have right now. Because I believe the Lord is moving me in a new direction and moving me out of my comfort zone, I feel that I am fighting fear and insecurities. I did not realize how comfortable I have become. Although things are uncomfortable and I’m scared I am pressing forward. I am just beginning this job search journey, however already this week I have made some calls that have not been easy for me to do. Inside I want to run and say forget it, however I have made myself (through a lot of self talk) make the phone calls that I think I need to make to find a job. For my personality type this is not easy. It’s funny how I can say all the right things in my mind and think yep that is exactly the way I need to do it. When the time comes down to making the call I can think of all kinds of excuses not to do it. I guess that is the difference of knowing how and what to do and doing what you know you should do. You would think that when I know what I should do and know how to do it that it should be easy to do, but it’s not for me. I have to force myself to do what I know I should do. I try to convince myself by imagining how I will feel once the action is completed. As hard as this is I know the Lord is walking me through this and I will grow from this experience. As I have realized that I am lacking faith & trust right now these have been my top priority on my prayer list this week. I will continue to walk on this journey and will see the victory in this issue. I will share the process and progresses with any of you that find yourself here reading about my journeys to victory. Hopefully you will come back again. I am open to your thoughts, encouragement and prayers.

It feels good to be back blogging again. I have missed it.

Until Later,
~Betty~

Jody, Upward, Salvation

I know I’m supposed to be taking a break from blogging this week, but I just had to share this story. I want to give you the background information before I tell you what I really want to tell you.

Jody, my 5 year old, is in Upward Cheerleading and I am the adult coach. She has practice every Monday and her games are on Saturdays. At last Saturday’s game her behavior was so bad that, as her mother (not her coach), I took her out of her game and made her go sit with John, her dad, in the sound booth. I know that Jody has a stubborn streak in her and can make life difficult at times. However, on Saturday I saw intense disobedient streak in her and she was determined not to do what I wanted her to do. This was very different than what I have seen in her before. Therefore, as a mom, I felt very discouraged and defeated and not sure how I was going to handle the behavior. After I separated Jody and she had time to sit, her behavior did get better for the rest of the day. –Good thing!

Monday night we had cheer practice. During every Upward practice there is a set time for a short devotional. This past Monday our devotional was the plan of salvation. I went through the material, explained that sin was the bad things that we do and that Jesus wants to forgive us if we ask him. I also explained that Jesus wants us to live for him and come into our hearts and lives. Then I prayed for each of the girls. I told the girls if they want to or if they do ask Jesus into their hearts to let me know.

Wednesday morning as I was getting the girls ready for school, Jody came running out of the bathroom and here is the conversation:

Jody: I have been talking, but really it was praying to Jesus.

Mom: Well that’s good

Jody: I prayed that Jesus would make me die

Mom: WHAT?

Jody: Yea that way He could make me again and He could make me good.

Mom: Oh! You mean to make you a new creation

Jody: Yeah. I just asked Jesus into my heart and to forgive me of the bad things I do like you said at cheerleading. I’m not going to talk anymore and I’m going to be good at cheerleading.

As my heart was melting and wanted to cry. This made a mom very proud and happy.

You know that Jody was busy on the phone and at church Wednesday night telling anyone who would listen what she did. Not only was I proud, but she was too.

I am so glad that we put the girls in Upward this year. Jody is a little young for Upward, but I talked to those in charge and asked them if I helped out if I could sign Jody up for cheerleading now there will be eternal benefits for them saying yes. Thanks Doug & Michelle.

I am feeling very honored and blessed.

(Of course you would know that Satan is not happy and is fighting me this week. I have really been struggling with my oldest daughter, Bethany. This will encourage us to pray more.)

Until Later,
Betty

Ouch that hurt!

I have been a Christian for awhile, I attend church every Sunday, I listen to Christian radio, I read Christian books, and I even visit Christian blogs, however this week while I was reading in Matthew, I was convicted.

Last week I made daily Bible reading as one of my goals. At first I didn’t know where to really start. Therefore, I ended up reading The Sermon on the Mount in Matthew. This was not new scripture to me, but I thought I would be encouraged and reminded of certain scriptures. I was not expecting to be convicted. You see I have been dealing with some temptations in my life and have been praying about them. Therefore, as I started reading the scriptures, God met with me and my heart, and in a lovingly way convicted me where I needed to be convicted. This passage also reminded me that when we face temptation that we need to resist and run from it. Therefore, if you see me running by, just know that I am running from temptation.

It doesn’t matter how long we have been Christians or the Christian things that we do, God knows our hearts and things that other people can’t see. God reminded me that He is not only interested in what I do; he is also interested in my heart and my attitude. After reading in the Bible this week I felt like God & I met below the surface of the “Christian” things and we met on the heart level. Please don’t misunderstand me. I believe that Church, Christian books, Christian music, Christian blogs, and Christian friends are blessings from God, have a special place in my heart, and God uses those things in my life. However, those things can not take the place that only God and His word can fill in our lives. God wants to connect with us deeply and teach us how to live for Him.

Please forgive me if what I’m trying to say and share isn’t coming out right. I guess all I’m trying to say is; it doesn’t matter how long we have been a Christian or all the right things that we do, God is still working on us. Just because we have been a Christian for awhile there are times when we still need to be corrected. God wants to draw us closer and closer to Him. He loves us no matter what. This is what I experienced this week in my Bible reading and I wanted to share it with you. I hope this all makes sense, if not Oh Well, just know I met with God this week and it was way overdue.

Until Later,
Betty

Blessed & Being a Blessing

Several months ago we were having a lot of car problems and had some unexpected expenses that came up. A good friend of ours was working on our car and bought the parts that he needed to fix it. The agreement was when everything was said and done they would give us a final cost and we would make it right. At the time our finances were so tight and other unexpected expenses came up that I just couldn’t squeeze out the money in our budget for the car repairs. I shared our circumstances with our friends and let them in on what was going on. This is a couple who understands what it like is to live life and are were we are too. At this particular time God was blessing them financially and their response to me was right now we don’t need the money so pay it back when you can afford it. As I was praying about this and confiding with my friend, I prayed that when we were able to pay this back it would be at a time when this couple would need the money and it would be a blessing to them as they were blessing us. God answered that prayer this week. This couple graciously offered to fix the brakes on our van while we were gone on vacation last week. When we got back I was able to give them a check for the cost of the brakes and what we owed them from several months back. I found out it was a time for them that they needed the extra money to cover certain expenses and at this time we had the money to pay them.

God is so good how He just works those things out. I love knowing we can trust Him to take care of things we don’t know are going on. Of course I say this after the fact. It’s not so easy trusting Him before we see what He is doing. I am still learning on this journey and it does strengthen my faith to see God working. I am feeling blessed and loved today.

Until Later,
~Betty~

God's Expectations

When we first moved to Georgia a lot things did not happen the way I expected them to, which caused a lot of hurt and disappointments on my part. During our first year in GA it took John longer to find a job than what we expected and that was one of the hardest years of our married life. I remember times of crying & crying & crying on my way to work and then once I got there putting on a mask as if nothing was wrong. Then our 2nd year came and we were able to become 1st time home owners, what a blessing! John now has a full time job that he likes and I have been able to restart my in home day care business. For the most part things have been good, not always great, but good. During this second year was when God started working on a heart issue of mine. We all have issues in our lives that God does not always make aware to us that we need to deal with or change until He is ready to walk us through them. Well, this was one of those. I have always been one that wants to grow in the Lord and be what He wants me to be. However, I don’t always realize that sometimes growing pains hurt and I mean deeply hurt.

Sarah at in the Midst of It posted about her daily schedule and just being honest about how normal life is and not having to be perfect to be a good mom, good Christian, and to be loved (ok so the being perfect part is my interpretation of what she wrote not necessarily what she said). This post reminded me that it is okay to be human and I don’t have to live up to certain expectations that I put on myself. This past year God has been teaching me that He is the perfect and wholly One and I only need to live up to His expectations and not the expectations of others. I have always been a people pleaser and worry about what others think or might say.

There have been certain people in my life that I have always tried to please no matter what. There have been certain expectations that I have tried to live up to and tried to be a certain type of person. In a lot of ways I don’t know who this person or people are that I have been trying to impress, live up to, and meet their expectations, but it sure has affected my life. God has been teaching me that He is the only one that I should be so concerned about what He thinks of me and not other people. I have said over and over again that you can’t please everyone and it only matters what God thinks. However, to live it and not just say it is another story. It has been very hurtful to let go of those expectations and live those words. I would not believe that to be true if I did not experience this past year.

I have had to let go of certain expectations and come to some realizations and it has been a painful part of this journey to be who God wants me to be.

Some new thoughts I have learned this past year are:
· I do not have to be just like anyone else
· I do not have to be organized
· I do not have to have a spotless house
· It is okay to watch some TV and to let my children watch some TV
· It is Okay to spend money on things that I like and want to have
· It is okay to be Betty
· I don’t have to be the most outgoing person for God to use for His purpose
· I don’t always have to know what to say in every situation

Some of these things I am still learning and still putting into practice. I know there are other things too that I’m not remember right now. In a lot of ways I am at the beginning of the journey of not worry about what others think, but I am confident that God is there with me and will walk me through every step of the way. There may still be more pain ahead of me, but I will walk on this journey with the Lord beside me and enjoy the blessings he gives me.

Thank you Sarah for reminding me that I am still loved, valued, and a good mom without having to be that “perfect mom” out there that gets up at 5:00am to run 5 miles in 25 min, have 2 separate devotional times, and to cook breakfast all before my kids wake up.

Until Later
~Betty~