God's Expectations

When we first moved to Georgia a lot things did not happen the way I expected them to, which caused a lot of hurt and disappointments on my part. During our first year in GA it took John longer to find a job than what we expected and that was one of the hardest years of our married life. I remember times of crying & crying & crying on my way to work and then once I got there putting on a mask as if nothing was wrong. Then our 2nd year came and we were able to become 1st time home owners, what a blessing! John now has a full time job that he likes and I have been able to restart my in home day care business. For the most part things have been good, not always great, but good. During this second year was when God started working on a heart issue of mine. We all have issues in our lives that God does not always make aware to us that we need to deal with or change until He is ready to walk us through them. Well, this was one of those. I have always been one that wants to grow in the Lord and be what He wants me to be. However, I don’t always realize that sometimes growing pains hurt and I mean deeply hurt.

Sarah at in the Midst of It posted about her daily schedule and just being honest about how normal life is and not having to be perfect to be a good mom, good Christian, and to be loved (ok so the being perfect part is my interpretation of what she wrote not necessarily what she said). This post reminded me that it is okay to be human and I don’t have to live up to certain expectations that I put on myself. This past year God has been teaching me that He is the perfect and wholly One and I only need to live up to His expectations and not the expectations of others. I have always been a people pleaser and worry about what others think or might say.

There have been certain people in my life that I have always tried to please no matter what. There have been certain expectations that I have tried to live up to and tried to be a certain type of person. In a lot of ways I don’t know who this person or people are that I have been trying to impress, live up to, and meet their expectations, but it sure has affected my life. God has been teaching me that He is the only one that I should be so concerned about what He thinks of me and not other people. I have said over and over again that you can’t please everyone and it only matters what God thinks. However, to live it and not just say it is another story. It has been very hurtful to let go of those expectations and live those words. I would not believe that to be true if I did not experience this past year.

I have had to let go of certain expectations and come to some realizations and it has been a painful part of this journey to be who God wants me to be.

Some new thoughts I have learned this past year are:
· I do not have to be just like anyone else
· I do not have to be organized
· I do not have to have a spotless house
· It is okay to watch some TV and to let my children watch some TV
· It is Okay to spend money on things that I like and want to have
· It is okay to be Betty
· I don’t have to be the most outgoing person for God to use for His purpose
· I don’t always have to know what to say in every situation

Some of these things I am still learning and still putting into practice. I know there are other things too that I’m not remember right now. In a lot of ways I am at the beginning of the journey of not worry about what others think, but I am confident that God is there with me and will walk me through every step of the way. There may still be more pain ahead of me, but I will walk on this journey with the Lord beside me and enjoy the blessings he gives me.

Thank you Sarah for reminding me that I am still loved, valued, and a good mom without having to be that “perfect mom” out there that gets up at 5:00am to run 5 miles in 25 min, have 2 separate devotional times, and to cook breakfast all before my kids wake up.

Until Later
~Betty~