Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Sunday, April 13, 2008
I am committed to loose weight in 2008! I was encouraged by my loosing before vacation, but seem to be gaining some of my weight back. I have to get back on track. My goal this week is to drink water daily and to exercise on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday. I will post on how well I do.
While we were on vacation we planned some structured and unstructured activities. We went to the Country Music Hall of Fame, The Grand Ole Opry, The Hermitage (the Home of Andrew Jackson), downtown Nashville, drove down Music Row, and went shopping at Opry Mills Mall. We also took time to be able to swim at the pool at the hotel.
At Opry Mills Mall the girls got to feed and touch Sting Rays. At first the girls were scared to touch them, which they get naturally from their mom LOL! However, once they saw other people touching them and keeping their hands in the pond they seemed to get use to it and touched them. Even I touched a couple of them. They feel slimy.
I was so impressed that Bethany, my 10 year old, took such an interest in learning something about history while on vacation at The Hermitage House. She gets that from her dad. Bethany and John loved learning all the interesting facts about Andrew Jackson and how things were in his day. Jody, my 6 year old, on the other hand enjoyed seeing the mansion, but could have passed on everything else.
Jody loved the pool the most about vacation. Jody has always loved water and will stay in the pool all day long if you let her. However, she still didn't like to go under the water and when jumping in the pool would only do it if she knew someone was going to catch her. Well, she has advanced. She started doing tricks with Bethany and jumping in on her own and was loving every minute of it. In some ways I loved seeing her Independence, but in other ways I felt sad that she doesn't need me in that way anymore. :( ? :). I'm sure you can relate.
This vacation was a great time for our family. We not only got to do some fun things, but it was a great relaxing time away and just what my spirit needed.
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
I know it has been awhile since I have last posted. I have struggled with what to write about and how to put my thoughts together. I really have missed blogging and want to get back to it, at least that is my plan.
Life here is starting to calm down a little. It has been a hard adjustment to moving and working outside the home full time, but God has walked with us each step of the way and I have drawn closer to him through this part of my journey.
This past weekend we took a little vacation to Nashville, TN and had a wonderful time! It was a great time to get away and relax. It was something I really needed and was well over due.
As a child I don't ever remember a time I went on a family vacation with my parents. It just wasn't something we did or was encouraged. I do remember going to the county fair EVERY year, but that was as close to a vacation as we did. I always had the desire to go on a vacation and felt jealous of those families that did those type of things. As I grew up there were many things I said I would do differently as a mom and wife. Planning vacations and traveling with my family was one of those things and I have changed that in my family.
Because it took me longer than expected to find a full time job our budget has been very tight lately and things have been a struggle. However, things are getting better. Therefore, I was able to fulfill my hearts desire and planned this family vacation.
The details of the trip is still to come. Right now I am going to enjoy a special home cooked breakfast with my family.
Saturday, March 01, 2008
Working full time, moving, adjusting to a new school, Upward basketball, Bible Quizzing, Children's Praise team, guitar lessons, dance lessons, and trying to find family and personal time has been challenging for our family. Trying to balance and succeed at all these things are more than I can handle right now. I need a break and it is evident by ways I have been responding to my friends and family. A few weeks ago our pastor preached on how as a Christian we have an enemy that is wanting to attack us and lately I sure do feel like his prey and have been devoured. After my wounds have healed I will pick up my weapons that I dropped (my bible reading, prayer, and devotions) and will get back into the battle. But first I am taking a break. This weekend is the first weekend in about 3 months or more that we have NOTHING planned and nowhere we have to go. I am keeping it that way. We get to stay home, clean, organize, menu plan, go grocery shopping, and relax. I didn't realize how much I do enjoy these things.
As a family we have decided to make some changes in our lives and have revisited our priorities. I'm learning that with working full time now outside of the home that I can't do all the things that I used to be able to do. God has to come first in my life, then family, then church and other activities. Lately I have been putting church and others things first in my life and that is what I need to change.
5 minutes listening to GOD (Reading his Word),
5 minutes talking to GOD (Praying), and
5 minutes reading some type of devotional material
We are then to report back of how spending 15 minutes a day with God has made a difference in our week. I have to admit I did not succeed at this for the whole week. However, I am starting this today. I believe one reason why Satan has been devouring me lately is because I have not been spending time with God and getting the power & strength I need from Him. I can't win this battle on my own. I have to do it with the power of the Holy Spirit! Starting today I am accepting this 555 deal. So how about you? Are you ready for a good deal?
Saturday, February 23, 2008
In my last post I said I was coming back to blogging and it has still been awhile since I have posted. I have started several posts and then I get stuck and can't seem to finish my thoughts. I am still planning to post my thoughts more regularly, but life has been challenging lately and I want to share part of it. So just know that I am working on different posts and hope to share them soon. I do have something to share that happened last week at church.
In the children's department at our church we have a security system in place where parents have to sign their children in and out. I know the leaders in charge have put much time and effort into this system to make it work and be a safe place for our children while they are at church learning about God. Keeping that in mind I try not to complain to much about things (I TRY not to!!!!!!!!!). However, this week I just have to complain about our system here. First of all let me explain our system. We have a table set up in front of the children's department where parents sign in their children when they arrive at church. Once the parent sign's their name the child receives a paper wristband with a number on it that corresponds with a tag that is given to the parent. The parent then needs to show this tag when picking up their child and the children worker will match the number on the parent's tag to the child's wristband. This is good especially if the children's worker does not know the parent of the child. During the church service if there is a problem or your child needs you, your number will come up on the projector screen that is used in the worship service. This system has been in use for over a year and has worked well. That was until last Sunday when my child's number came on the screen. This system is great for the 99% of the people that 1. know the number of their child and 2. are not SLEEPING in service, which by the way is what was happening to me. When the number system "failed" me, a children's worker came into service to "get" (wake) me and then told me that my youngest had an accident. Great system if one is aware of the number and is not sleeping in service.
I will for sure be going to bed early this Saturday night. :)! No more relaxing in the bath tub, painting my nails, talking to a friend on the phone, and laying in bed sharing my thoughts and ideas with my husband. lol!
Sunday, February 03, 2008
I know it has been awhile since I last posted and since then a lot of things have changed in my life and it has been stressful. Here is an update and plans for my future blogging.
Last year in 2007 was a very tough year for me and my family and I am looking forward to a better year in 2008. Looking back through my difficult moments in 2007 I remember times of failures, dissappointments, and frustrations. I went through a time of being mad at God and not understanding why He was allowing certain things to happen in my life and not answering my prayers the way I wanted and thought they needed to be answered. I went through a time when I didn't have any control over certain things in my life. I went through a time of heartbreak and the tears sure did flow a lot. I went through a time of not seeing God working in my life and not knowing where He was leading and not sure I wanted to follow any more. I went through a time of being angry with God and feeling like He left me. Boy am I glad 2007 is over. However through all the tough times in 2007 I did learn and seen God's love for me. Now looking back I can see how God used those hard times to show me His love and how He protected my marriage and has made my family stronger. As I reflect back on last year I am learning from my mistakes and how to make 2008 a better year for our family. Through our circumstances the words that I felt God telling my heart is "restore and rebuild". Therefore 2008 will be a restoring and rebuilding year for me. I'm still allowing God to lead me "On The Journey To Victory!"
There are areas in my life that I am going to work on in 2008 and step it up a noch. Those areas are weight loss, parenting, and my career. I am going to use this blog to record my journey in these areas of my life in 2008. My plan is to post sometime during the weekend about my week in review, then to weigh in and record my weight loss or gain on Fridays (Fitness Fridays). I am planning to post more often than what I have been doing. I'm still learning how to balance my pleasure of blogging and my life responsiblilities. I believe I can use my enjoyment of blogging to obtain my goals that I want to accomplish.
So I am back to posting and using my blog again. So come and join me on this journey and I will keep you posted on what God is doing in my life.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
This past year has had it's share of disappointments. However, today I have a lot to be Thankful for no matter the disappointments I have faced.
- First of after a long struggle, I found a job that I really love and it provides great benefits for me and my family. I have posted about the details of how I got the job here.
- I have a wonderful husband that has been great in completing tasks around the house the last few weeks. He has done a lot jumping in and doing things for me as I transition into working full time. He has also taken care of the girls and has given me time away from being mom & wife lately. I have felt so loved! He really is awesome and I can't express enough of how thankful I am for him!
- I am not only thankful for finding a job, I am thankful for the job I have. I have been there for 2 weeks and I love it and feel like I have the qualifications to do this job. I don't have to convince others (or myself) that I can do it. I have been very impressed with the administration. I have enjoyed working with my co - teacher and believe we will have a good working relationship. Also the kids are wonderful and seeing them learn my name and their hugs are such a blessing.
- I am so thankful for my best friend Pat! I am so thankful that I have a friend that just "Gets Me!" We live nine hours away from each other and only sees each other about once a year, but our friendship is such a gift from God. We talk on the phone about once a week for 1 - 2 hours at a time (thank goodness for free night minutes on my cell phone). Our lives and the situations we are dealing with are so different. She is 30 years older than me, has adult children, grand children, and is in the retirement years of her life. My children are still young and I am still in the midst of developing my working career. Regardless of the differences of our lives - our hearts just seem to connect and we are able to share our thoughts and feelings with each other and don't always have to explain it to each other. It seems like we take turns "whining" to each other and offering not only a listening ear, but an understanding heart. I am so thankful that God has brought Pat into my life and has blessed our friendship like only He can.
- I am Thankful for my family. I love being a mom and wife. I love seeing my girls play together. I love watching movies with my girls and playing card games with them (as we have started doing more of). Also my extended family. Since my parents have died I don't see my extend family very much, but I received a Thanksgiving card in the mail last week from an aunt and uncle of mine that I haven't seen for about 2 1/2 years. I'm also thankful for my cousins Heidi and Angie that I keep in contact with through email and Instant Messaging.
- I am thankful for my family that I "adopted" just because they are wonderful. Ron & Faye have supported, loved me, and have given me great advise. They have been that mother & father figure to me in my life. Even when I have faced one of the biggest failure moments of my life they have still been there hurting with me and saying "Betty we still love you and are praying for you." I love being including in their lives. I also am thankful for their daughter Caryl, who I grew up with. We have been friends since grade school and she is "Aunt Caryl" to my girls and I'm "Aunt Betty" to her girls. Our friendship has changed through the years and it has not developed into what we both thought it would be, but we both agree that we each hold a special place in our each other's heart and we are thankful to be apart of each other's lives and always will be.
- I am thankful for the friends that God has brought into my life. There are 2 other couples that we get together with and have such a good time. The guys have a bond together - they have similar sense of humors and watch bad sci-fi B movies together and we women connect and talk. I get so blessed by seeing John have "friends" of his own in his life.
- I am also thankful for my church and church family. They are awesome and we just love the church we attend.
- I am so thankful for Blogging and being able to express myself this way. I am so thankful for my blogging friend Cheri at Keeping Up With His Plans. Cheri you have blessed me so much these past few months. You have touched my heart in way that I will never be able to express what it has meant to me. Thanks you for your prayers and support.
- Most importantly in life I am Thankful for my relationship with Jesus Christ. I am thankful that He saw my imperfections and chose to love me anyways. He has blessed me over and over again. I am so thankful that in every situation in life He walks with me through them all.
As I have been typing this post it has been reminding me of all the great and wonderful things in my life. I am now going to go and spend Thanksgiving day with my family, cooking a big dinner, watching the parade, listening to a football game, watching a movie with my girls, and taking a nap. I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving day! If you want to read more Thankful Thursday posts please visit Laurel Wreath's Reflections
Saturday, November 17, 2007
I have been wanting to post for awhile now. I will start to write something and then my thoughts freeze and I just don't seem to be able to put my thoughts together and write a complete post. I should have shared this a week ago in a Thankful Thursday post, but just couldn't get my thoughts to come together. However here is a much overdue update post:
After much prayer and struggle, I found a full time job! I was working at a college bookstore as a part time, temporary worker. It was going good, but just didn't pay what I need. The reason I accepted this position this past summer was because I thought maybe by working there it would be easier to hear about other positions in the community or maybe at the college. I have been working with kids for quite some time and ran a home day care for years, therefore I decided that I no longer wanted to work in that field and wanted to work in the social work field, since I do have a degree in the field. As I started looking for a social work job, I kept running into a wall and nothing was opening up for me. I felt very frustrated and discouraged and really struggled with the Lord about this. I started to think about other types of jobs and possibly looking into the center based child care field (since I did have child care experience). Well I finally got to the point to where I said "OK God I don't understand what you are doing in my life and don't understand why a job has not opened for me. I trust you and know that you can open the right door, and I will just 'Be Still and Know You are God.'" In my prayer time I got to the point where I just prayed that for whatever reason He had for me and my family to go through this difficult time, that He would use it to strengthen us and for His glory. I also prayed that when the right job came along he would make it happen in a way that only he could and that it would all just fall into place. Well that is what happened!
Thursday, November 01, 2007
- I am so thankful for my husband and the relationship we have together. I love talking and sharing my heart & thoughts with John.
- I am thankful for the part time jobs I have right now, while I search for a full time job.
- I'm thankful for the people that are in my life and how God has blessed me with them.
- I am thankful for the person God has created me to be.
- I'm thankful for blogging and the need that it meets in me. It has been so nice to start posting more this week.
- I am thankful for my family.
I have learned that no matter what is going on in our lives, we can always find something to be thankful for. If you want to list what you are thankful for or to visit others who list please visit Crystal at God is in Control Not Me.
Monday, October 29, 2007
Because I want to get back to start posting more regularly, I am going to start "My Week in Review." This will be my weekly post (on Sunday or Monday) updating and informing about my previous week. I want to do this as a way to let people know what is happening in our lives and as a way to journal, document, and remember the events in our lives as my girls grow up. So feel welcome to join me and leave a comment letting me know you were here.
This past week has been busy which has been a normal thing lately.
Our local Salvation Army has a conservatory program which offers dance classes, music classes, and drama classes. On Tuesday evenings John & I teach 2 drama classes, Bethany is taking a guitar class and Jody is taking a dance class. Therefore, every Tuesday is busy. This past Tuesday we signed papers and put our house on the market and am hoping to sell it quickly. The realtor came to the house and put the sign in the yard on Wednesday. We have talked to the girls about moving and they have been with us looking at other places to live, but this week has been an emotional roller coaster ride with them about selling the house. Apparently it has been a topic of discussion at the bus stop and neighbors have been asking them questions about us moving. In one moment the girls are excited about moving and then in the next they remember something they like and decide they don't want to move. I have just been listening to them and letting them express whatever they are feeling at the time. I am also reassuring them that it doesn't matter where we live, the important thing is we will all be together and we are still a family.
On Wednesday the girls got inducted in to the Caravan program, which is a Christian scouting program sponsored by our church.
This past weekend our family was able to go see High School Musical on ice. If you read this post you will remember Bethany won these tickets back in March. Our family rode the Marta into Atlanta and enjoyed the show together. We had AWESOME seats. We were in the second row from the floor. It was a good family time and the girls were excited and sang along with most of the songs. The girls & I really enjoyed the first and second movie, therefore it was not the same seeing the show with different actors. Although it was cool to see the skaters and I didn't point it out to the girls, therefore they seemed to really enjoy it.
Later that night we invited our friends over for a Mexican dinner and a movie night. We have this group of friends that when we get together we have a theme dinner - which we women all cook together and the guys watch a really bad scifi B movie. As always it was a good time. Since we are trying to sell our house we thought this might be one of the last times we will be able to have this type of party in our current house. The thought of going down to Atlanta in the morning and then hosting this party that evening was stress full, but it all worked out. I have become very comfortable with this group of friends, because my philosophy was whatever wasn't done when they got there we would do together. The other ladies came as unprepared as I was and we all just enjoyed each others company anyway.
Well this has been a look into my past week. I hope to post weekly about my everyday activities.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
This sure has been a busy month since the last time I posted. I will try to catch up on some of the things that have happen and some things that have not happened!
Jody turned 6 earlier this month. She was so excited!!!! We celebrated her birthday at a local park and invited our friends to join us for a time of play, cake, and ice cream. The kids played and the adults were able to visit with each other. We all seemed to have a good time. I am so thankful for the friends I have. They have been such a blessing to me.
Jody is enjoying school so far and loves to ride the bus with her big sis. She seems to have an inner excitement about school. She has been bringing site words home to study and she gets so proud of herself when she can tell you how to spell them.
Bethany had her first Bible quiz meet of the year. She did pretty good. Along with answering questions the kids have to memorize 20 Bible verses they have to say by the end of the year. Bethany has already said 7 of them. She does good at memorization. I was proud of her.
Bethany still struggles with talking at school. Every week in her weekly Friday folder, she gets a check for needs to control talking. Actually she did have one week with no checks and she got to be student of the week. She was so excited and we were proud. When report cards came out, she did really well. The book work Bethany does at school is really good. We just have to get her to learn how to control her talking. :)
John's job has been very stressful lately, because they have been getting ready for their federal review. At last, the review is now over and he is able to relax a little more. The past couple of weeks God has been reminding me of what a great husband I have and I am so thankful he is my bestfriend and glad he is in my life.
Right now I am working two part time jobs and not making the money I need to be making. I am back working at a local college book store and at a local gym in the childcare area. I am still looking for one full time job!!!! I have sent out many resumes and applyed for many jobs. I have had 3 interviews and did not get any of those jobs. During these dissappointments I have been frustrated, discouraged, and angry. However, I have also came to the point of trusting God even when I don't understand.
I believe God could open the right door and provide a job for me.
I believe He has a plan for me and wants to provide good things.
I believe He can do more than I can think or imagine.
I belive God will provide for me.
I believe God loves me.
I believe God is in control.
I believe God's timing is the best.
God has brought me to stand on each of these statements by faith. During this time in my life I have doubted my faith more than any other time in my life. I don't know God's plan or why certain things are happening, but I have come to the point in my faith that I CHOOSE to trust God and believe that His word is true. I have had to DECIDE to believe these statements I just wrote. I have been so discourageda and frustrated about not finding a job and it taking so long, but I choose to trust Christ and His plan - even if I don't yet know what that is. The past couple of weeks I have just given my search over to the Lord and decided to trust that when God wants me to have a job, He will provide it. Until then I am looking for other ways in my life that God is blessing me - and I am finding them! I don't know why God has not blessed me with a job, but I am blessed in a lot of other ways. He has been showing me His love in so many other ways. I see God's blessing in my marriage. I could not imagine going through this time without John. Some of the decisions that we have had to make could have caused a division in our spirit and cause problems, but we have been in unity with our decisions. Our marriage is surviving a very stressful time in our lives and that is a blessing from God that I am glad I have. I have some wonderful friends that God has showed me His love through them. I have a wonderful church family that loves and supports us. As God is teaching me to trust Him for a job and with our finances, He is also showing me His love.
This is just some of the lessons God is teaching me. I hope to find the time to share more soon. I also hope to be back and share that I have found a job, but that is up to the Lord.
Monday, September 24, 2007
Wednesday: Cheese Manicotti
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Have you ever had a friend that you love the relationship and enjoy being around, but then life happens. For many reasons time passes and you notice that it has been while since you have talked to your friend or you have been together. I can think of several times this has happened to me.
I start thinking about my friend and realize it has been quite some time since I have talked to her. My desire is to call and she how she is doing and let her know what is going on in my life and find out what is going on in her life, but when I realized that so much time has past I feel a little guilty. Then I start wondering how she will respond since it's been awhile and then I wonder where I should start and what should I say. Well, how I feel about this blog right now.
I have been busy and haven't posted for awhile. I have been wanting to post, but since it's been awhile I have been sure how to start back up. I was hoping that when I came back to blogging I would have great news and to be able to tell you that I found a job, I love it & the people, it's going great, it is just what I wanted, and the pay is more than what I expected. I wanted to be able to share how God provided just the right job, at just the right time, and how God did something really BIG and wonderful in my life that only God can do. .... Well that hasn't happened, but I've been wanting to get back to posting and use my blog to express my feelings and my walk with the Lord. Therefore, I am going to share my difficult moments along with the good things. Right now it seems like I have been having a lot of difficult moments. I don't want this blog to be all negative and just telling about the hard stuff, but that is just where I am right now. If this is to negative for you then you can pray for me and ask the Lord to send me a special blessing that I can share :). In all honesty, even though I am going through a hard time in my life, I have been blessed with special moments along the way. I will just have to remember to share those too.
I'm still looking for a job. I had an interview a couple of weeks ago and thought it went well. I was real excited about the job. I felt like the interviewer described my dream job. When she was describing her ideal candidate I was sure she was describing me. Apparently God has other plans, because I didn't get that job. Therefore, my search continues.
Since the last time I posted school has started back and my baby is now in Kindergarten. So far the school year is going good. Jody, my 5 year old, is excited about school and learning new things. Bethany, my 10 year old 4th grader, is having a tougher year. She is maturing and growing up. I don't recall giving her permission to do that. :) LOL! We had coupons for a free meal at Chick-fil-a so we went there for dinner last night and Bethany was not real interested in the play ground anymore. As Jody enjoyed the tunnels and slides, Bethany chose to stand there to sing and come up with a dance routine. Then last night the school had a movie night and showed High School Musical. We have the DVD, have seen it a million times on TV, but still had to go to see it at school :) LOL! John refused to go see it so we planned to have a girls night out! The girls & I got to the school and Bethany went off in one direction with her friends, Jody went off in the other direction with her friends and I was left there wondering where were my friends? AFTER the movie I met some of my girls friend's mom who I could have enjoyed sitting with during the movie and talked liked everyone else in the room did. Good thing everyone had already seen the movie, because you would not have been able to follow it. The kids talked during the whole movie until the last song when most of the kids all stood and join in to sing the finale with Zac and Gabriela. That was the best! It sure did put a smile on my face and other parents too.
Do you like to go out for breakfast? We do, especially on Saturday mornings. Well because of my challenge of finding a job, that is not a wise choice for us today. Therefore, we have decided to cook our own "family style" brunch. John has made pancakes, I made an egg casserole, Bethany made drinks, and Jody set the table. I tell you that to say that I am now leaving and going to enjoy some family time. I hope you all are enjoying some family time this weekend too. I am going to try to be back more often. During my break I did learn there are people who are reading my blog that do not comment and who I didn't expect to be reading. (Shep, thanks for reading and feel free to comment and let me know you are there :) LOL)
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Don't know if anyone is still reading this blog or not. Just wanted to let you know that because of my need for a job, I have been using my computer time for intensive job search instead of blogging. I have received the peace from the Lord about my job search that I have been wanting. I am just waiting for the right job to open, but I now have the confidence and assurance that it will happen. I want to thank you all for your prayers. I can feel the difference in my life because of people's prayers. They have made a difference! I hope to return soon with the good news of a job. I do miss you all, but you have to do what you have to do!
Friday, August 10, 2007
I received this in an email and it encouraged me. I aslo thought this described a lot of what I have been going through lately. Therefore I thought I would share this little poem. Let me know your thoughts.
Philippians 4:13 --- I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
The road to success is not straight.
There is a curve called Failure,
a loop called Confusion,
speed bumps called Friends,
red lights called Enemies,
caution lights called Family.
You will have flats called Jobs.
But, if you have a spare called Determination,
an engine called Perseverance,
insurance called Faith,
a driver called Jesus,
you will make it to a place called Success.
Friday, August 03, 2007
My journey continues. I still do not know what God is doing in my life. I saw a church sign that said:
"In life, are you where God wants you to be?"
My response is I sure hope not! I don't know what God is doing in my life or what He is trying to teach me. I know I can not stay where I currently am. Maybe I'm just in His waiting room. As you know, the big thing going on in my life right now is trying to find a job. I have been working temporarily part time at a college book store, well it is no longer temporary. I no longer work there. They are now heading into their slow time and don't need me any more. I'm asking God, now what? I am still waiting for his response. I don't understand why it is taking so long to find a job. Our finances can not handle much more time off. I have been looking back at some of our decisions and wondering if I made the right decisions or not. Maybe I shouldn't try to second guess myself, but I don't know what else to do. As I reflect back on some of the decisions that we have made, at the time we made the decisions I don't think that we acted out of God's will or disobeyed Him. I remember praying that "Lord if this is not what you want for us then don't let the doors open." I think when we made certain decisions we took the information and knowledge we had at the time and did what we thought was best at the time. It's so easy to beat myself up and think I did something so wrong to be struggling like we are. Maybe I shouldn't be blaming myself, but I don't know what else to think or what else to do. I have also been thinking about what I can do differently. I have been praying that God will give me wisdom, knowledge, and new ideas to try. I am still waiting! I am really struggling with my faith right now and praying that God will come through for me. Deep down, I know He will! I'm just waiting for His blessings and asking Him to get me out of this situation that I'm in right now.
I know my posts lately have not been upbeat or encouraging, but I am just expressing where I am right now. I don't plan to stay in this mode, but believe me when I say that I have been praying and trying to see God's hand and His plan in everything that is happening in our lives lately. I just feel down and am using this blog to express my feelings and thoughts. I don't mean to be discouraging or down, but I'm just sharing my journey right now and what I'm currently dealing with. I shared with my best friend, Pat, today that I know this time will pass, but until then I'm struggling and feel like a big storm cloud is following me everywhere I go.
In my quiet time and at church, as an act of my will, not feelings, I have been praising the Lord in spite of my circumstances and how I'm feeling. Pat encouraged me today as an act of my will to not doubt the Lord and trust that He will come through for my family. This is my challenge for the week. I will let you know how it goes and what the Lord does for us.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
I am learning something about myself. It seems like it takes me 2 times to learn something. For the second time in 6 months our computer crashed and I lost my pictures and my files that I had saved on the computer. The pictures that I lost I will be able to get most of them back from friends and family who have duplicates. The biggest frustration is loosing my files. I had each month of my budget plan and all of John's and my different resumes and cover letters saved on the computer. Do you realize how much time I had invested in those things? I had different resumes and cover letters developed for different types of jobs we have been applying for. Writing and developing these does not come easy to me, therefore to think about starting over does not thrill me at all. The fact that this has happened to me before you would think that I would have known better and would have saved and backed up everything, but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I didn't! I am so frustrated with myself. However, I can honestly say that I have learned this time. From this point on, I will save my things to a disk and/or jump drive.
I have missed everyone this week. I have not been able to blog or get on line since Sunday night. So now I will try to catch up with everyone. Also I wanted to thank you all for the wonderful comments from my last post. You all made me cry. Thank you for your prayers. I realized that I have some great blog friends, along with my REAL friends (who most of them I don't think read my blog).
Blogging helps me to relax and I enjoy it, but I now have to go to bed. I work early tomorrow and have a friend from Ohio coming in to visit. I hope everyone has a good day.
Saturday, July 21, 2007
My roller coaster life continues. I am trying to find a full time job preferably in the social work field. However, I applied for a job at a child care center close to my home. I talked to the director and she asked me to come in for a formal interview with the assistant director. The interview was short and I felt like I didn't click with the assisant director and that I bombed the interview. Then to my suprise a couple days later (a Friday) the assistant director called me and asked if I was still interested in the position. When I responded yes she wanted me to start on Monday. Because of previous commitments, I told her I couldn't start until the following week. She said OK, we discussed the pay and said she would talk to the owner about the pay rate.
Thinking that meant I got the job, I gave the bookstore (where I was working) my notice and was looking forward to this new job. Can you guess what happened?
For some reason I just had an unsure feeling about this new job, therefore I called to confirm my starting date and time to be there. I was told by the assistant director (the one I didn't click with) that the director was off for the next two weeks and that they world have to call me back and let me know for sure if I got the job or not. My stomach dropped as I was going down that hill. I had already turned in my notice and I didn't have a job to go to and knowing that I NEED to have a job.
I don't understand how in one phone call an employer can ask a person to start a job the next business day and then in the next phone call tell them they may or may not have the job. I also don't understand how an employer could offer you a job and expect you to be available the next business day! I asked these questions to the manager at the bookstore where I'm working and I had a different experience talking to someone who could be totally objective and not someone that knows me and cares about me and wanting the best for me. You know what I mean? I don't mean to say that she's not a caring person - just that she's not emotionally connected or involved with me. I asked for her opinion as a business person and as an employer. She had some of the same thoughts I did. She said it sounded like the director and assistant director had some miscommunication problems. She also advised me that I may want to reconsider if that would be a place I would want to work if I 'm having these kinds of problems before I even start working there. She also asked me if this was really the job I wanted or was I settling? Well, she was right. If I took that job I would be settling and it would just be something until the job I wanted would come along. She also advised me not to job hop, because that will look bad on a resume - which I already knew. Therefore, I have decided that if I do get a call back I am not accepting the job at the daycare center. I did talk to the mangers at the bookstore and they are aware that I am looking for a full time social work job and have agreed to let me work at the bookstore until I find the right job for me. Of course this is only part time so I really do need to find something soon, which is a totally different post all together.
This roller coaster ride of finding the right job and trying to figure out what God is teaching me and wants me to do continues. I still feel like God is not hearing or listening to my prayers and I am going through a dry period in my Christian walk right now. However, I have decided that I am going to Praise the Lord anyways no matter how I feel! I asked a friend of mine this morning to pray for me, because God is not listening to my prayers and maybe He will listen to yours. I am going to ask you in Blog world the same thing. Would you please say a pray for me. I need a special touch from the Lord. I need to hear Him say that He still loves me. I need to hear him say that He has our job and our financial situation under control. I need Him to provide our needs like His word says He will. I need to know that I am walking in the right path He wants me to and if I'm not, I need to know how and where to change. If you wouldn't mind please say a prayer for me. I sure would appreciate it.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Having 5 extra overnight guest for a week and 2 others during the day CAN be a WONDERFUL experience! John's family were here visiting from out of state last week. It was good to see everyone and at the end of the week we all were still talking to each other and all in one piece. :) I had to work 3 days of the week, but John was off all week and got to entertain everyone. He did a great job!
We made some memories last week. One night we all were hanging out on our patio while the kids were playing in the yard. We had a total of 4 girls; my daughters, Bethany(9) & Jody(5), and my nieces Kayla (12) and Katie (10). As it started to get dark the kids started playing flash light tag & hide-and-seek. It wasn't long until the adults joined in and we all started playing in the dark. I can not remember the last time I played hide-and-seek. I used to love that game as a kid. I really should put down my guard and play like this more often. We divided into partners and changed partners at each turn/ round and took turns being "it." I'm not sure if the adults or kids had more fun. However, we did create a memory for the girls and the adults. This was a great way to start out our week with the family. Because of other plans and activities this was the only day we were able to do this, but it was such a great time!
The other big thing we did was we went to downtown Atlanta and visited the World of Coke Museum. Our family is a Pepsi fan, but we still agreed to visit :). It was interesting to learn and hear about the history of the coke product and see how it has changed through the years. The highlight of the tour was the taste test of the different types of cokes they serve in different countries. I am not one that is real daring and will try new "weird" foods, but I was open to try the different drinks. The cup was small, so a small taste can't hurt right? I started out tasted a couple apple flavored drinks from Asia and those weren't to bad. So it was all going good. Then came the drink from Italy!!!!! Cheri I thought of you and wondered if you really can get the Beverly drink in Italy? It was the worst thing I have ever tasted. I only took a small sip, but the taste was so intense that it filled my whole mouth. It was awful! After that I decided I would not try anything else and was done with the tour! I heard that they make the Beverly drink out of the peels of grapefruit. All I can say is I will never try that again. According to what I am hearing from others, many people feel the same way I do about the drink. I'm interested to hear from Cheri, who lives in Italy, if they really have this drink there and if you have tried it and your thoughts on the drink! Do tell!
Overall we had a good visit with the family and got to do some fun things. I hope everyone had a good week and I hope to get caught up on every one's blog this week. I also have other things to share about my job and my "real life" roller coaster ride, therefore my next post shouldn't be that far apart. I started a new system to blog and will see how long it last. I have found that I really enjoy writing (with pen & paper instead of just typing) my thoughts, but I really enjoy bloging and sharing my thoughts and feelings. Therefore, I bought a notebook and will write my thoughts, feelings, events, and etc. down then type them on my blog. I'm hoping this will help me to keep track of ideas/memories I want to remember too. We will see how it goes.
Thursday, July 05, 2007
I know it has been awhile since I have posted, but there has been a lot going on here and have not much time to get my thoughts together to be understood. This week I have started a new chapter in my life. I am no longer doing child care in my home. I am working at a local college bookstore right now. I have mixed feelings about this and am not sure if it will work out or not. It all happened faster than what I expected, but felt like God was opening the door, therefore I walked through it for now. This job is temporary with a good chance it may lead into something more permanent. I am still looking for another job and would like to work in the Social Work field. I am also struggling with not staying home with my girls, I didn't think that would bother me as much as it is. I know to meet our need financially I have to have something that pays more. Right now I feel like I am on a roller coaster and I can't see the track in front of me to know which way we are going next. I know God is in control, but for someone who likes details it is REALLY hard to trust Him, not impossible just HARD! I know God is working in my life and will get me through this period in our lives, but I sure don't know what he is doing and don't see His plan at all. I feel like I am getting a deaf ear when I pray. I have been a Christian long enough to know not to trust my feelings, but I'm just expressing them here. I am learning to trust the Lord through this and am trying to enjoy my life as I am on this ride. I am praying for God's will and for Him to be glorified.
Now with working outside the home I'm not sure how often I will be posting. We have family coming into town next week so I don't think I will have time to blog. Hopefully I will catch up in a couple of weeks.
Saturday, June 23, 2007
- walking everyday
- drinking water everyday
- bible reading everyday
- declutter/ organize something once a day
- One load of laundry a day
- keeping my kitchen sink clean
I hope everyone else has a good week. I will report on how these things go next Saturday! Visit Lara here to visit more SMART Habit Saturdays!
Thursday, June 21, 2007
It’s Thursday again, which means it’s time to talk about something I am thankful for.
This week I am thankful for my husband. As I posted here John and I were fighting all last week, but we did resolve our issues. This week I was reminded of some good things about my husband.
This week I chose to work on reading to my children as a SMART Habit Saturday goal. You can visit Lara here to learn more about that. At dinner one night I was talking to John about this and explaining to girls my thoughts and plans about this. John knowing my desire took the lead by taking my thought one step further and said after dinner there would be no more television tonight and we were going to the library and spend the rest of the evening reading. As a family we started reading the Laura Ingalls Wilder books. I can not begin to express how much this just thrilled me. John and I disagree on the amount of time we allow the TV to be on in our house, therefore I was so excited when he decided to do this. It made me feel very thankful for him.
Also I was reminded this week that with all the faults and weaknesses that John has that irritated me so much last week, I am glad John is in my life.
I am thankful:
- For who John is and how God uses him
- For when it comes to the big things in life John is a good husband
- He cares about me & our girls
- He loves God
- Someone that I can trust
- Someone that I can talk to
- Someone that I respect
- He knows right from wrong
- He lives a life with convictions
This week our neighbor had a bad situation happen to her and we went over to help out and got in the middle of a mess. I know God had to be guiding us and protecting us, because I did not think about what could be happening or what could have happen to us. We just reacted to a desperate cry for help from a 10 year girl, who was claiming that someone was beating up her mom. We went over and as John broke up the fight, the guy punched John in the mouth and took off running. The police and the paramedics came and took care of things.
I am thankful
- That we were able to help
- That things were not any worse than they were
- Wonderful neighbors that also came to help when it was needed
- The neighborhood that we live in
- For John’s attitude about the whole thing
- Policemen that protect us from violent people
- Wisdom from God that tells us when we can and should help and when we need to let someone else help
Overall this week I am thankful for the life that I live, for my husband, and for my supportive friends.
You can visit Iris at Sting my Heart to see more Thankful Thursdays.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
When I started this post I had every intention to publishing this on time. However, things that I had no control over prevented me from doing that. I want to record and share this story so I decided to still post it as a Weekend Reflection, even with it being late.
I want to start out by sharing about last weekend celebrating my 12th wedding anniversary with my husband. Let me say that we had the best weekend we could have asked for. For months I have been planning on doing something special for our anniversary this year and I wanted to surprise him. I had so much fun keeping the surprise from him and my friends got involved to really get John going and to make him think we were doing something we were not. One friend told him we were heading south to the beach and another friend told him we were heading north. John was so confused he didn’t know what to think.
It started Friday night and I told him our friends Tom & Michelle wanted to take us to this restaurant to “make up for blowing the surprise.” We were heading to downtown Atlanta and when we turn into the parking lot for the Braves vs. Cubs game (which John is a huge Cubs fan) he looked back at me and glared as if I did something wrong. Lol ! I had convinced him earlier that week that we could not get tickets, because I forgot they were in town when I made our weekend plans. Friends have made the comment of how manipulative I can be, but John has forgiven me lol! So for our anniversary John got to watch the cubs win for a change! The first pitch of the inning was a home run for the cubs! The game was so much fun, because we were not just sitting with braves fans, but baseball fans. It was neat to hear the guys take about the strength and weaknesses of both team, not just the positive about their favorite team and the negative about the opposing team. The braves fan that were sitting around us were having fun watching John rooting for the cubs too, knowing that the cubs struggle to win games. It was such a good time and surprising John was the best.
Saturday we went back to Atlanta and went shopping at The Container Store. I have read several blogs talk about this store so when I learned there was one in Atlanta I wanted to check it out and we did. John was even starting to get excited about organization :)! We then went to the hotel and had the whole swimming pool and hot tub to ourselves. I guess most people don’t use the pool in the middle of the afternoon. We ended our evening by going to a comedy club to see Jon Reep. Because of John’s sense of humor and that he likes to laugh, he really enjoyed this. It was our first time to ever go somewhere like that. It was good. I was worried a little bit of what the jokes may be like and if it would stay clean or not. There were some things that I did not approve of, but overall it was good.
Sunday we had a Caravan, a Christian scouting program at our church, celebration for our girls. We enjoyed our girls and then later that night we went to Stone Mountain Park to watch the Laser show.
It was an awesome weekend, I could not have asked for anything better!
This past week Bethany, my 9 year old, went to church camp. She had a great time. I remember as a kid I loved to go to church camp. I’m glad Bethany is enjoying it as much as I did.
The other big thing about the week was that John was off work and we fought all week. It is amazing that we went from having the best weekend ever to having one of the worst weeks of fighting we have ever had. We went from the highest of high to the lowest of the low. The good news is that we were able to work things out and were able to resolves some issues. I have to be honest; I was worried there for awhile. It didn’t look like we were going to resolve some things, but we did! Praise the Lord!
Saturday, June 16, 2007
I have not always been an organized person. However, for the past few years I have been making it more of a priority. I used to look at my clutter and know that it needs to be put away in a neater and more organized matter, but just didn’t know how to do it. Organization doesn’t come to me naturally, so it has always been a struggle for me. Last year I found some organizational websites which began to help. Then I started blogging and I found Laura the organized junkie and I learned practical ways to become organized and seeing her pictures and reading her posts really taught me how to BECOME organized, not just telling me that I needed to be organized. I learned how containers and boundaries can make a difference in my home and how they can help me to be clutter free and how they help with a sense of peace I can have in my home. Don’t get me wrong, I still have far to go on my organizational journey, but I am so much farther down the path than where I have been. Also just to be clear, I do not judge or think less of anyone else that chooses NOT to have an organized or clutter free home. I respect people’s decision to choose for themselves. The fact is we all have the right to decide for ourselves about our homes. I’m just saying that for me, I wanted things to be different in my home. I was tired of things being a mess, not being able find things, and it always taking hours to clean up to have anyone over for dinner. I find that I enjoy my home and family in a different way. I love the feeling of my home being cleaned and organized.
Also on this journey I found the Flylady who talks about starting out small and setting up routines. She teaches how to become & STAY organized in your everyday life. These principals have helped me to keep my house clean & organized throughout the day, although I don’t follow every single principal of hers.
As I continued to blog I found Lara The Lazy Organizer. She started talking about how smart it is to set goals and form habits. She even started a weekly blog carnival called SMART Habit Saturday, where we choose a new goal or habit to work on each week and post about it on our blog. I started out doing this every week and then I took a break from blogging and stopped posting about my goals and habits. However, these habits have also helped me to have an organized home and have helped me improve other areas in my life. On this journey I am thankful for these ladies that share their experiences, knowledge, and encourage others to better themselves. The knowledge, the habits, and the goals that I formed have made a difference in my life and my home. Therefore, this week I was thinking about things I wanted to change in my life and about my family and thought it would be good to start participating in SMART Habit Saturdays again.
I struggle a lot to get Bethany, my 9 year old, to read books. I know she needs to be reading daily and it is always a battle with her. John and I have been talking about this and discussing ideas of how to get her to read. I was over at Lucy, An Ordinary Mom’s, site and read about her goal of reading to her children and God used that post to convict me to work on that goal with my children. Therefore, I decided that I would make that my goal this week. I am going to go to the Library and check out the Laura Ingalls Wilder, Little House on the Prairie, book and I want to have a special time each night before bedtime and read as a family. My thinking is if we try to do this as a family time, Bethany may not fight it as much. Please pray for me I will need it. So this is my goal this week and I will report next week to as how it goes.
Please visit Lara here for more Smart Habit Saturday post.
In my Weekend Reflections I am going to share how my awesome weekend with my husband, celebrating our 12th year wedding anniversary, went from the highest point to the lowest and how we worked it out. Please come back and read my story.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
I am thankful for God Blessings in my life and how He provides for me when I need him. One issue I really try not to blog about is finances and any situation relating to that, but I really must share this story in order to Praise God and give Him the glory.
Last week I was working on our budget and for various reasons I knew our expenses would be increasing this month and our income would be decreasing, which is not a joyful or fun position to be in. However, I continued to list our expenses for the month and then list our income for the month. In some ways we were coming up short. I rechecked some categories and was going to make it work. I do our budget in a spreadsheet and each bill has a category and I add or subtract money into each category as I need to. One of the categories that we pay is tithe. We believe in giving 10% of our income to our local church that we attend. When we get paid I put 10% of our income into our tithe category and keep track of it that way. Usually what happens on the weeks that we get paid, as I’m sitting in service on Sunday mornings I will write out our check. Sometimes I don’t always remember the exact amount that is in our account, but I’m usually pretty close to the figure.
Well, last week when I was working on our budget I felt like I should figure out the exact amount in our tithe account and write out the check. After figuring out our expenses and income I knew it was going to be really tight and we would be short on some bills and would have to go without some things. I didn’t have any solutions. I prayed about our financial situation as I have been for several months now.
You see, John & I are both looking for a different job that pays better and will be able to take care of our financial obligations and our needs. Therefore we are playing a wait and see game. We are sending out resumes and praying that we get interviews and then jobs, but that is as far as we are in the process. We are waiting for God to lead and open the right doors and trying to trust Him while we are waiting, which can be a challenge.
So back to the budget, I really felt like the Lord was telling me to write out the tithe check first even if that meant other bills may not get paid. To be honest, I struggled and was tempted not to pay our tithe this time. I just couldn’t see how some of our bills were going to get paid and we would make it through the month. As I was struggling with writing out that check I felt the Lord reminding me of the scripture verse
Later that night I received an unexpected check that more than covered the amount we needed for the rest of bills, and some extra that we were able to go out and celebrate our 12th wedding anniversary. God knew not only what our need was, but what the desire of my heart was too. Because I trusted Him and was obedient, even when it did not make sense to me He blessed me beyond what I could imagine or have asked for. This was bigger and more than what I would have even thought to ask for. God showered His blessing on us and I felt so loved.
I don’t know how God is going to work everything out from this point on, but I know I can trust Him and I know that He will provide and come through for His children. I am so thankful for God’s love, blessings, and guidance in my life. I give Him all the glory. If you have experience similar to this or how God has blessed you at the time you needed it, I would love to hear about it. We should share how God has blessed us and this is my way to share how he is working in my life. I hope God is blessing you too.
Please check out Sing My Heart for more Thankful Thursday posts.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
I am participating in the May Day Challenge, which you can learn more about it here. It is weigh in time again! I have not been weighing myself everyday this week. It has been about every other day and that seems to be working okay. I still only record my weight on Saturdays.
Here are my stats:
Beginning weight: 212.6
Last week weight: 211.6 (which was a gain of 3.8 from the week before)
This week’s weight: 210.0
Loss/ gain: -2.6 :)
Summary of Past Week:
This past week I did not do my structured exercising everyday, but was more active than normal. I did not make my goal of water intake everyday, but did drink more than what I was drinking. I am making baby steps in the right direction; I just have a long way to go. Also this past week was my time of the month so I was always hungry and had a hard time to stop eating.
Plan for this week:
My plan for this week is pretty much the same: to drink more water and less tea. I also need to get back into my exercise plan. I am still setting boundaries for myself and trying to follow through with them.
My boundaries this week are:
- Drink four glasses of water everyday
- Exercising 5 days a week
- No sugar, except in my tea (which is half of what I used to use)
- No Pop (soda) except on Saturday and Sunday and then only one each day
My challenge this week will be to follow through.Please visit Tales from the Scales here to visit more challengers or to become apart of the challenge.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Lunch: Chicken Lunchmeat Sandwiches, carrots & peas, and bananas
Snack: Gram Crackers
Dinner: Italian Chicken, cheesy vegetable melody, potatoes
Lunch: Grilled Cheese, green beans, oranges
Snack: Pizza Rolls
Dinner: Bruschetta Chicken Bake
Lunch: Fish Sticks, French Fries, Pineapple
Snack: Snack Crackers with Peanut butter
Dinner: Hamburgers, onion rings
Lunch: Chicken Wings, corn, Oranges
Snack: Peanut butter bread
Dinner: Omelets, toast, hash browns
To participate or to visit more menus please visit Laura here.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
It is Weigh In time again. I have not done very well this week with my eating and exercising. As much as I don’t want to admit it I had a weight gain of 3.8lbs this week.
Here are my stats:
Beginning weight 212.6
Last week weight: 207.8
This week’s weight: 211.6
Loss/ gain: +3.8 L
Summary of Past Week:
I’m not surprise of my weight gain. I know there were days when I did not make the best food choices this week. I am not going to give up. This is the point where I usually fall off the journey and say forget it for awhile and eat and drink whatever I want and try again later down the road. However, I’m not going to do that this time. I am recommitting to this challenge right now. I’m not going to wait for a few weeks.
Plan of this week:
My plan for this week is to drink more water and less tea. I am struggling with drinking water. I am learning that there is just no easy way to do this; I will just have to do it. I have limited myself to only have Mt. Dew on the weekends, which is such a BIG step for me. I’m going to reflect on why disciplining myself on drinking water is so hard for me. As a mom, I can set boundaries and discipline my children and follow through with my guidelines, but it is so hard to follow through on the guidelines I set for myself. I don’t mean impossible, just hard. This week I am working on self discipline and following through on the boundaries I set for myself. These boundaries are:
- Drinking four glasses of water everyday
- Exercising 5 days a week
- No sugar, except in my tea (which is half of what I used to use)
- No Pop (soda) except on Saturday and Sunday and then only one each day
My challenge this week will be to get back on track and to follow through. To find out more about this challenge or to visit others please check out Tales from the Scales here.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
I have been weighing myself daily and recording it, and I’m beginning to wonder if I will continue to do that. Some days it becomes discouraging to see my weight go up & down so much, but in other ways it helps me to stay on target.
My plan for this week is to exercise 5 days a week and to drink more water. I have been staying on target with my exercise. I really need to work on the water intake. I also plan to eat more salads this week with Balsamic Vinegar Dressing instead of my favorite Creamy Ranch.
We will see how this week goes and I will report next week. So how did you do this week?
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Summer break started this week for my girls. Bethany has already been spending the night at friend’s houses and we have had friends here too. Oh the fun to be a kid on summer break!
My house was clean for about 12 hours!
Friday night we went to my friend Alice’s daughter’s surprise birthday party and it was a lot of fun.
On Saturday I had a chance to sleep in and do nothing in the morning and then in the afternoon we went to the Lake and did some shopping.
On Friday I had some good bonding time with my girls while my day care kids were asleep. All the day care kids left early on Friday. Our family actually got to have an early dinner for a change.
I was able to spend a special moment with my friend Faye, who is like a mom to me. She gave me some mom advice and it spoke to my heart like only she can.
I guess that’s all that has gone on this week (at least all I can think of right now). I know not too exciting this week, but time continues to go on.
I also wanted to say thank you to my blogging friends that stop by to say hi and let me know you are thinking about me and praying for me. It truly blesses my heart. I know I have mentioned before that I am dealing with some issues in my life that isn’t blogable and I could still use your prayers for them. I have not yet got victory in them, but am still praying and trusting the Lord to come through (at least trying to trust and not worrying). I know in my heart He will bring Victory, it’s just the journey getting there is some times hard and painful.
My goal this week is to blog more and share some of my thoughts.
If you would like to visit more weekend reflections please visit Judi here.